Wednesday, August 5, 2009

I thought i was over this

words are bleeding on my pages;
pages like a sad song that i sang ages.

weeks ago-- Purple summer came and washed away my tears and lifted my chin.
telling me its alright, just forget him
and i did and i worked and i slaved and i bathed.
but yet in my dreams in my dreams there he stays.

God;
what can i do?
can i do to quit this?
I let something go that i knew was wrong for me--
but still it hurts inside to think of what would of been.

Its pathetic i know-- Second chances are for dummies.
love does not concur all God.
but a storm churns in my tummy.

A nausea wave of anger whenever i see his beautiful face.
because at one point i was made but now an embrace.

Worlds are different now;
two very different beings.

I was a fool for asking him out;
and asking him out created this thing.
this monster inside of me.
that wishes he were gone.
that monster that clings to me;
and cries when the dreams dont go on.

In them i know... that what we were.
what is.
is not right.

But this could of been so easily avoided--
if not for that night.

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